Queensland - but no queens!

4th December

Well, here we are in tropical queensland, australia. And it is hot. More than that, it is humid. So humid. I don't think that either of us have been anywhere like this. It's above the tropic of capricorn and so the humidity at this time of the year is obscene - it is cloudy and overcast, doesn't drop below 23°c yet doesn't rain... 'til january when it doesn't stop raining!

We arrived here really late last night after a few delays - the plane had to divert to brisbane and it was a bumpy ol' ride! In total we're here for four nights, and the main reason for coming here is the reef and the rainforests. Both of which we plan to get a little sneak of before we leave.

I think joey summarised the end of new zealand. A spot of underground rafting/tubing in glowworm filled caves and some surfing at raglan. The tubing was fun but tamer than the plans we'd made for the previous day. Still, if the caves get flooded, the caves get flooded... Raglan was pretty cool. It's a global surfing hotspot. The waves at manu bay were around 15ft high and way out of my league, but fortunately there was a more suitable bay with 4-6ft waves. As joey said, it wasn't a beginners beach. We were out for an hour, but it was seriously hard work with some interesting currents.

In summary, we loved new zealand. The towns weren't too clever, in many ways it's a bit backward. Technologically it's like england was 20 years ago. It's also extremely remote - 4 million people and 20 million sheep. But what sets the country apart is it's incredible scenery - it's geography and geology. The mountains, the geothermal areas, the fjords, volcanic landscape, stunning beaches, wildlife, and beautiful rivers. So much variety in such a small country. I think we'd like to go back to see more, but it's a long way to go for a holiday! The other thing worth mentioning is the UV. The country is so close to the hole in the ozone layer that you can get burnt in ten minutes on a cold cloudy day. Quite frightening.

So new zealand has come to an end, now starts the aussie adventure. At least we won't be struggling in the cold nights anymore. Even though it gets up to 40°c here we (I) shouldn't burn as much...


5th December
Spiders. That's why I don't like it here. We were having dinner in the Cairns yacht club (not as posh as it sounds) when jo told me she saw a spider cross the floor behind me that was bigger than her hand. As you can imagine, I didn't enjoy the rest of my dinner. I'm not a spider fan, but i'd rather be able to see them than know that they're running around wildly behind me. Especially when they're the size of a hand. We ate up quick and split. All I can think about now is spiders. They're all over me!


6th December
What a great day. Got up at 6:30 and left the hotel at 7:30. By 8am we were lying on the sun deck on the front of a 70ft catamaran. Two hours to michealmas cay in the great barrier reef. The cat dropped anchor about 250m off shore and we pontooned to the cay (sand island). Flippers, goggles, snorkles, and stinger suits on. Within minutes we'd seen a baby black tipped reef shark, blue spotted ray, giant clams and all manner of tropical reef fish including the usually shy joey-fish. I even got a couple of pictures of that beauty! Swam back to the boat and had lunch. The reef itself is brightly coloured and alive! However, large sections are clearly dead or dying. They are grey and lifeless. Apparently this is due to sun bleaching and pollution, plus the occasional cyclone!

Buffet lunch - I think I may have eaten enough to pay for the trip - and then on to the forbidden reef. Not as daunting as it sounds, but another section of reef a few miles away. Another hour of snorkelling and duck-diving. This time we saw some little squid type things and some bigger fish in all manner of colours.

This was followed up by two hours sailing back to the mainland with the sun on our backs. A fantastically fantastic day all together!

And then we had curry for dinner...


7th December
After checking out of our nice hotel we got our underwater photos developed and collected the van. Campervan mark II is smaller than his neanderthal cousin. Much smaller. No toilet, but more storage and more manageable. It's also a lot newer so we're hoping this brute won't give us half as much grief.

After stocking up on tucker we drove down to mission beach. Mission beach is a string of ramshackle communities set in deep thick rainforest about 200km south of Cairns. We felt like we were out in the outback, deep in jungle... Neither of us slept particularly well. The humidity was so intense and the insects make a hell of a racket...


8th December
What was I thinking. Every now and then we do something that I really want to do (surfing or sailing) or something joey might want to do (rollerblading, eating veggie food etc). Well, joey read up on this place called The Sanctury (in mission beach). They do yoga escapes, organic food and all that crap. And you can stay in a deluxe en-suite cabin or a rudimentary hut. We've been in campsites for nearly two months so reckoned we could make do with the hut. We drove into thick rainforest to a small clearing/car park. From there a half mile trek uphill. Now, a half mile walk doesn't seem bad but at 30+ degrees and extreme humidity surrounded by dense rainforest, lizards and toads, we were exhausted when we arrived. Shown to our hut, we discovered it was little more than a mosquito net with a tarpaulin roof and a sliding door. The branches of the trees and palms were right up against the side. My morale was declining...

We went down to mission beach on the sand. A beautiful view of dunk island and the pacific. Unfortunately you can't swim on the beaches at the moment due to the stingers (they kill). So we killed time crocodile hunting (to no avail) and then renewed our wedding vows on the desserted beach, sharing a snack size twix instead of wedding rings. It was jo's twix, so I didn't think she'd be too impressed if I'd just eaten it...

Back to "the sanctury" for a really nice dinner. Lots of yoga and all that going on. It was full of strong powerful women empowering themselves and finding themselves. After dinner we were shown some of the locals. Rhinoceros beetle. Giant stick insect. What about snakes? Oh, you won't see a snake. They're more scared of you... Ever get the impression you're being paid lip service? So mowgli (joey) and baloo (myself) ambled down the narrow path, and who should be blocking our path other than shear kahn (a bloody snake). He was about three feet long and lay across the width of the path. No climbing over him. They're supposed to be shy, so I stamped my foot near him but he didn't budge. You could smell my fear... Reversing slowly we went back to the main hut and informed the guy working there. His response? Oh, it must be the rain that's brought them all out, someone else has just seen one too. Great thanks. Queensland has 8 of the 10 most poisonous snakes including the Taipan. The worlds deadliest. We went back and sammy the snake had gone. We went to bed, but I didn't sleep at all. Maybe the fear of snakes. That and the huntsman spiders (who should also leave you alone) and the bats and the mossies... I think I had maybe one hours sleep. I was just too alert. Somehow princess mowgli slept pretty well and she was frightened of the cane toads...


9th December
...we showered and split pretty quick thinking it would only be a matter of time til I got savaged by a croc. Before we left, we had time to rummage through their wet-tropic animal encyclopedia. It was either a brown tree snake or, yup, a taipan! The brown tree snake is mildly venomous but timid, so should have done a bunk when I stamped my foot. The taipan is aggressive and very poisonous. I dread to think which it was that we saw...

We hit the road. 450km to Airlie Beach. An access town to the Whitsundays which we planned to nail the following day. After the sufferings of the prior night we got in some beers and had a nice dinner. Dinner done, we headed back to the van and what do I see? A huge spider on the van. I scuttled near, hoping to scare him away, but I inadvertently shooed him into the crack between the doors. Meaning? We couldn't open the door without the risk of him being in the van, and I needed some sleep after the prior night... If you'd listened closely, you may have heard murmerings of "i've had enough wildlife" and even "I want to go back to new zealand". After half an hour or so it left of it's own accord, but i'm not sure I can get use to this...


10th December (joey) - well, what can I say....what an amazing morning! Woke up and thought..."what shall we do today?, I know, lets get our own helicopter, fly low over all the Whitsundays and then land on our own section of Whitehaven Beach"....so we did! The Whitsundays are 74 small islands off the coast of tropical Queensland. Whitsunday Island (the biggest) is home to one of the most beautiful beaches in the world..Whitehaven Beach. We're talking the whitest sand ever! (photos to follow!). The flight out there was amazing, you could see everything, forests, beaches, sea etc. Matt and I have now decided to give up our respective careers in favour of becoming helicopter pilots!

(Matt) - yes, whitehaven beach was pretty awesome. The weather wasn't perfect, so few boats or planes went out, thus the need to charter a helicopter (not as dear as you might think). It did mean that the islands were all really quiet and we had the most amazing beach to ourselves.

After that we visited the town centre only to find it's a stop on the east coast backpacker pub crawl. The place was full of soap-dodging 18yr olds finding themselves and wearing homemade clothes, all getting drunk. They could have done it in ibiza for less...


Joey's musings:- Queensland is a weird place, I have never been as near to the tropic of capricorn and all it brings with it....wild parrotts in trees, giant stick insects, spiders and gecko's everywhere! Wildlife is not for the fainthearted....."Matt"!

I am slowly getting used to the heat here, everyday is spent outdoors as the van gets too hot so there is no getting away from it! It has turned into a bit of a whistlestop tour down the coast in a race to reach Sydney by Christmas....we are having a great time through. The night in the rainforest and private ride to The Whitsundays were certainly highlights for me..."oh what a hard life"!

Love to you all,

Joey xxxx